politricks and other distractions

Holy Hopeful Society, Batman!!

I know the SOTU (State of the Union) is a huge deal on Capitol Hill. Lobbyists work weeks to cram a phrase into the language. Staffers are up late nights, revising verb tenses and muscular imagery.

But can't we just delete this practice and the obvious theater of the moment? Nobody reveres American presidents anymore and only weirdos like me watch the speech. Oddly, I googled "SOTU" today and got sent to the White House press room site where I read a speech that had the applause lines marked. It talked about HIV/AIDS and creating a mentoring program for prisoners' kids. I finally realized it was the speech from 2003. I think it was the last one posted on the site.

So three years ago, we had an equally meaningless SOTU.

What I heard:

American Competitiveness Initiative
Make teachers work harder with fewer resources
Freedom
Prosperity
Violent crimes down
Welfare down 50%
Fewer abortions than any time in past 30 years
Fewer teen moms

We are witnessing a revolution of consciousness. Adoption and abstinence are working!

Gay marriage, bad.

We're a hopeful society (don't look at the man behind the curtain). Don't be depressed (take your meds). We have two fabulous new white guys on the Supreme Court (Spanish Inquisition).

Human cloning also way bad.

Big applause on "betray." Evidently as I learned recently, that's a very LOADED word, people.

Hopeful society. Mentor kids, this time not of prisoners.

Encourage kids to stay in school and study science and math (while their unemployed parents struggle to pay the bills so they don't get kicked out of their double-wide trailer).

Once again, maybe in a Hail Mary pass to the Log Cabin Republicans, "HIV/AIDS."

I watch as our president without lips keeps talking. He is very well coached. He dares to utter the names "Lincoln... Martin Luther King, Jr. ..." and of course the ever-popular references to the Last Good War, WWII.

We're taunted not to "turn back" because we have to "finish the job." Stop asking questions about why and just start paddling fast for us all. More words fall from his straight white lines, "Courage... Americans... Freedom... Compete and excel... Moral commitment... Optimistic, faithful, confident of the victory to come."

Oh, Mr. President. You keep saying we're a country at war. What you don't get is that we're having a little play-within-a-play. We're at war internally and you've gotten us into a war externally. That's the state of this union.

If anyone is paying the least bit of attention, they should be able to see that this guy's just trying to play out the clock. He's gotten two Supreme Court justices in, he's already golden with the party and the conservative right. Time to hit the weight room.

Dubya does have the look and the star power to pull this off. Not much else, but that and some really strong advisors. Please, god (if there is a god), let the Democrats find that person somewhere.

Where are the charisma police when you need them? Finally - the obvious next job for Bill Clinton.

posted by dcnative @ 7:40 PM